Okay, so, before I took a turn into blogging about nipples and my husband being solicited for illegal drugs (and who WOULDN'T want to blog about those things?), I was writing about (and showing you pictures from) when my husband, James, and my younger son, Zachary, toured lots of China.
(Not ALL of it, mind you. Since China is super wicked big and all.)
On their travels, they saw really pretty Chinese-y buildings:
And, seriously you guys, don't you think that the roofs of Chinese-y buildings have a whole lot more character than the roofs of most American buildings?
I just love them.
And then the UFO Flying Water Bottle came back and refused to allow my husband to take any actual pictures of my child:
And then, out of nowhere, whilst trying to avoid bodily harm by the UFO Flying Water Bottle, my husband was presented with THE MAGIC-EST OF ANCIENT CHINESE MAGIC.
For BEHOLD! The Chinese city that they were visiting (named Shaolin) had some sort of magic wormhole or magic Harry-Potter-like flue network or who knows *what* sort of enchantment, but suddenly and quite out of nowhere, James was presented with the option to...
...magically visit our in-real-life friend, Digger, who is posted right now in Tallinn, Estonia!
But James sure did know that at the other end of that wrinkle in time and space, there would be ESTONIA. Amazing ESTONIA with its clear, crisp, clean air and its sushi (which Digger is constantly teasing us about having there in Tallinn (she has TWO sushi places within walking distance of her housing! TWO!), as we don't have any in Chengdu).
And I'm not sure if the English language has words strong enough to describe just exactly what my husband would do for: 1.) clean air, and 2.) sushi right now.
Being as that he was a parental chaperone on the school field trip (and was, thus, needed), and being as that he knew intuitively that if he even THOUGHT about going to Tallinn without me, I would be all:
he didn't journey on through regions unknown and travel to Sushi and Clean Air Heaven.
Instead, he journeyed on to that evening's hotel:
(in all its glory)
And enjoyed his hotel room's bathroom, which boasted NOT EVEN A WALL, but instead just a see-through curtain-like thingee:
Meaning that if two people were staying in the two-twin-bed bedroom, then while one was using the toilet, the other could, ostensibly, see them.
And while this wasn't a problem for James, since he had a room all to himself (the privilege of being a grownup), the same cannot be said for the school kids, who were bunking two kids to a room. Which meant that if one of them needed to use the toilet or take a shower, etc., the other one would have to leave the room entirely and wait out in the hall for the sake of privacy.
And if you're a parent, you already know how this story ends.
Meaning, of course, that Zachary barged into James' hotel room and announced that NO WAY was he going to use the bathroom in his assigned hotel room with other kids milling in and out randomly, meaning that James actually gave Zachary his bathroom. And waited out in the hall. On more than one occasion.
I'm sure, at that point, James would SO rather have been in Tallinn. BUT I DON'T CARE. HE'S NOT ALLOWED TO GO WITHOUT ME. Thus, this blog post's title.