James and I have never gotten cable tv.
Oh, sure, we've watched it at hotels and such... you know, when it's FREE... but we've never had it in our home.
Which means that, whenever we're at a hotel, the boys have their little faces pressed against the cathode ray tube (or whatever newfangled stuff they use nowadays to make a tv picture) with drool hanging down their chins, mesmerized. Which works, because that's totally preferable to them fighting with each other over stupid stuff in close quarters. Go ahead, boys, melt your brains. Want some sugary snacks with that?
So, anyway, recently the reality tv show "Say YES to the Dress!" was on. If you haven't seen it, it's basically a show taped in a super expensive wedding dress store, and it follows bridezillas on their quest for The Perfect Wedding Dress. Which is always absurdly, insanely, offensively expensive. Of course.
Matthew, my 17 year old son, was walking through the room while the show was on, and then he and I had the following conversation:
~ ~ ~
Show announcer person: ...And, so, 22-year-old bride Debbie is hoping to stay within her target price point of five thousand.
Matthew (horrified): Five THOUSAND?!
Me: Yup.
Matthew: DOLLARS?!
Me: Yup.
Matthew: On a DRESS?!
Me: Yup.
Matthew (incredulous, as you can see): Which she will only wear ONCE?!?!
Me (tired of repeating myself for questions that are, most likely, rhetorical in nature at this point): *silence*
Matthew: Oh HECK no! I'd tell her: Girl, you can totally just wear... I don't know... you can wear, like, TOWELS or something!
Me (amused, picturing this conversation in real life): Towels?
Matthew (almost pleading): But...they're soft! And white! Couldn't some dress-maker-person just sew towels together and make them into a dress?
Me (speechless, and also contemplating the huge level of REALITY my son will be getting in the years to come): *silence*
Matthew: Okay, well, then, can you, like, BUY a dress but then sell it to someone the next day for almost exactly what you paid for it?
Me: *silence with a touch of smirk*
Matthew (continuing with the pleading): But if I bought her a nice ring, would THAT be enough? At least a ring would last longer than a dress you wear once?!
Me: *snort*
Matthew: WHY does she have to have a dress anyway? That's just STUPID.
**Matthew huffs in an exasperated manner and exits stage left**
~ ~ ~
Refer back to the title of this blog post.
FIN.
That makes me laugh.
Posted by: Emily | 09/25/2011 at 07:18 PM
Hahahaha! This is what a similar topic sounds like between Mother and Daughter (same age):
Me: Hey Tia, They have a ring sizer here at the Jewelery counter so we'll know what size to order your new Purity Ring.
Tia: Great :0)
Then she preceeds to try on diamond rings with me (my 20th anniversary is comin up)
Tia: My new favorite stone is diamonds! Forget the quartz stuff I used to like!
Me: Uh, oh
Then she proceeds to interview the Salesgirl (college age) about the job.
Me: Come on Tia we better catch up with Dad and the girls.
Tia: Sure, I have enough of an idea about working here. Then I could make some extra money and buy my own jewelry.
Me: Atta girl! :0)
Posted by: Sam | 09/25/2011 at 07:31 PM
LOL! That's awesome!
Posted by: Sara Roy | 09/25/2011 at 08:07 PM
Nah, you'll still marry him off one day. There are girls out there who do not care to spend $5,000 (or even $1,000) on a dress they'll only wear once. Like yours truly!
Posted by: Liz M | 09/25/2011 at 09:30 PM
I am trying to raise my kids with the idea that elaborate weddings are pure craziness - that it would make more sense to spend money on a car, or a house, or blow it all on a nice honeymoon. I've never(!) been a part of a fancy, expensive wedding where anyone, except maybe some of the guests who were not that involved, actually had real FUN. It's too stressful - always full of tears and hair pulling - to pull off such a production where a dress is merely one piece of the mess. I've found 'simple' weddings to be a more beautiful experience. Focus on the couple and their day, rather than whether the centerpieces match the cake and nothing clashes with the brides head-dress and blah blah blah. Hope your sweet young man one day finds a girl, not a -zilla of any sort, who makes him happy, has the sense NOT to want to spend 10yrs income on one hellish show-off party, and perhaps, prefers soft fluffy towels to that crepey lacey stuff gowns are usually made of... better for a nice beach wedding anyway ;)
Posted by: Connie | 09/25/2011 at 11:44 PM
You raised that boy right!!! =)
On another note, the show wouldn't get too many viewers if the show wasn't a touch absurd. For their NEXT segment I'd like them to consider the absurd idea of making dresses out of easily found household supplies. Like towels. THAT is a good one.
NKL
Posted by: Naoma | 09/26/2011 at 05:08 AM
You are dating yourself with verbiage like 'cathode ray tube'....
Posted by: Alison | 09/26/2011 at 07:53 AM
@NKL: I bet a Project Runway/Say Yes to the Dress TV show is not that far away!!
Posted by: Alison | 09/26/2011 at 07:55 AM
Loved the post! Yeah, he won't wait for you to marry him off. He'll do it himself. He'll figure it out. He's just seventeen. You've raised him well and he will choose well. And who knows he may meet a girl that makes her own dress out of something recyclable or upcycleable - people come up with incredible things these days. It doesn't all have to be expensive (though a lot sure is).
Posted by: Daniela | 09/26/2011 at 07:13 PM
Sounds good to me. My wife's "wedding dress" was a simple white dress she found on sale for $13.
Posted by: 7 | 09/28/2011 at 05:40 AM
Too funny! I saw that show for the first time this summer and it was a bit like watching a train wreck. I'm with Matthew that much money on a dress is obscene.
On the other hand I paid $70 for my weeding dress on sale, and as it was silver damask not white lace I've been able to wear it to several balls since we have joined the FS (yes it still zips even after all the kids) I am sure that when the time comes Matthew will have the sense to choose a wife who has common sense and can stick to a reasonable budget.
Posted by: shannon | 09/29/2011 at 04:47 AM
*LOL*
You've got some great boys. . . and they WILL marry lovely girls and you'll have amazing DILs. . . <3
Posted by: TG | 09/30/2011 at 09:52 AM
That's funny. I rented my dress for under $100 as I didn't want to buy it. Overseas of course. Total we spent for the wedding and reception jointly - under $2500 and we had 70-80 guests. It's customary for the groom to pay for everything in the country I am from but we both pitched in and made it easy for ourselves. Not that my dad was too happy that he could NOT invite all 500+ of his friends and people I don't know... but he got a great son-in-law who he loves just as much as myself or even more :-)
Posted by: Mel | 10/02/2011 at 08:13 AM